In this article I will be sharing with you how to make and keep good friends. But before we go into that, let’s talk about why you need good friends. Stay with me!
Why you need Good Friends
- To boost confidence
- To achieve clear goals
- To open doors to opportunities
- To create vision leads
- To support decision making
- To pave the path to fulfillment
The last time you went down the valley of discouragement in the pursuit of your vision, how did you get back up? It’s either of two ways: You got motivated or challenged by a friend, or, You shook yourself from the dust and just decided to move on. The latter takes more time. If all you have in the journey to the fulfilment of your vision is you and you alone, you will get exhausted very soon. You need help. You need people. You need good friends!
Think about it. Even God needed you! Have you ever thought about that? God had a vision, a purpose for the world. He thought of how he could accomplish it. And then he made man and started a relationship with him. Again, God looked at the man he had created. He saw that Adam could not fulfill his given vision alone. And then he provided a help for him.
Can I tell you something? Any vision you can accomplish all by yourself is no true vision. Why? Because that vision will not stand the test of time and eternity. God-given visions are meant to last for generations – long after we are gone. True visions are visions that travel far into eternity. And no brother! You can’t achieve that all by yourself. God did not create us to live in isolation. Very importantly, he didn’t create us to fulfill our visions in isolation. To fulfill our God-given visions, we need all the love, help and support that good friendships can give.
How to Make Good Friends
Now that we’ve established the need for good friendships, you must understand that not every person is going to be a positive influence on your life.
Those closest to you determine your level of success, so choosing the right companions as partners in the pursuit of your life’s vision is an important decision. My advice is to surround yourself with talented people who will challenge you, help you grow and inspire you to maximize your potential.John Maxwell
Before you start making good friends, you want to take a break and look at the present relationships you have. Are they good for your vision? A relationship is bad for your vision in life if it adds absolutely nothing to it. Run a check on your current relationships. Who is adding value to you and who is draining your energy. Focus on your good relationships, invest in them and then you can begin to leverage on them.
How to make Godly Good Friends
- God is a good friend. Develop your relationship with God
- Discover yourself and define your life’s vision
- Take every opportunity to discover and connect with new people
- Maintain and invest in your relationships by keeping in touch
1. God is a Good Friend. Develop your Relationship with God.
I am one of the few that thrive with the God-first mentality. God provided help for Adam even when he didn’t know he needed it. He didn’t even have to ask for it. There is a way that God can connect you with godly good friends as your vision-helpers as you grow in your relationship with him.
2. Discover yourself and Define your Life’s Vision
Not many people have their discovered vision well defined and written. I’m not talking about that which you have written in your diary. Writing your vision is much more than that.
…write the vision, and make it plain upon the tables that he may run that readeth it.Habakkuk 2:2 (KJV)
Write your vision on your heart. Write it on your habits. Let your vision be visibly written on your attitude to life, write your vision on your environment, write it in your day to day communication, write it on your association. Do you have a vision but no help? No one believes in your vision? Start writing your vision everywhere. And let it be plain enough. Sooner than later, the right kind of friends will show up, ready to run with you.
3. Take every opportunity to discover and connect with new people.
No matter what your vision is, there are persons/organizations that have done or are doing something related. Get closer. Observe. Volunteer to help. There are a number of organizations out there who have the kind of helpers you are looking for, when they call out for volunteers and conferences, go out there, socialize, and don’t forget to cultivate your new friends into meaningful contacts.
4. Maintain and invest in your relationship by keeping in touch.
This is where the bulk of the work lies. You will agree with me that so many opportunities have being missed in life simply because we couldn’t keep up with some useful contacts. Something as simple as a regular phone conversation or social media chat could be the eagle’s wing upon which many successful visioneers are soaring. Friendships thrive only when you invest into them.
How to Keep Good Friends
- R – Respect: Value the talents, strengths and abilities of your friends
- E – Empower: Give time, knowledge and opportunities to your friends
- L – Listen: Empathy is a powerful tool. Use it in your dealings with your friends.
- A – Appreciate: Share sincere appreciation of your friends
- T – Talk: Learn what’s important to your friends and why.
- I – Inspire: Inspire your friends. Positive people have more influence than negative people.
- O – Observe: Constructive feedback is a valuable tool when shared correctly.
- N – Nurture: See the potentials in your friends and not just their current performance.
- S – Spend time: Friendships require time to develop
- H – Help them grow: Get out of your comfort zone to help them grow.
- I – Influence: Lead by example
- P – Prepare: Develop them for future.