Relationship Tips for singles continued from Blunt truth for singles.
“When you discover purpose that is when you discover partner because partner can only fit into purpose”
Know the essence of your relationship with the opposite sex. There are many brothers and sisters who are moving together and are not engaged. They are assuming. Sisters, taking a solo together with a brother is not proposal. Don’t allow any man or woman to monopolize your space. Make up your mind and know what you want.
Many of you brothers must understand that women believe in impression while men believe in expression. When you are always monitoring a woman, it gives her an impression. There are some brothers that are blindly giving sisters hope, always calling her all the time.
Stop assuming. That guy that you are always calling all the time and you are already developing feelings for him, has he opened his mouth to tell you something? If he’s monitoring you too much ask him “Are you the one or should I expect another?”
Some of the brothers do it deliberately. They are so interested in the sister’s life more than herself. It is wrong to accept or to receive signals because even most of those that say they want to get married to you are not serious. These days “I love you” has become national anthem and “I love you too” a pledge. You don’t have to pay to say it. And now people do not sit down to consider relationship before they enter.
Understand the mystery of choice. Your choice determines your chance. Your choice will either make you or destroy you. Your choice determines what you want to become in life. When you are making choice martially, you should not be too conscious of physical attributes.
There are some ladies who say “I want a very tall man” and they end up getting ‘tall trouble’. I want a man who is not too fat but it’s a little bit chubby and they get an affliction who is not too fat but a little bit chubby. I want a lady who has this kind of curves or shape. Those are physical attributes. Those are not what you consider when you are choosing. A woman may be figure eight today and when she gives birth to one, two, three children she becomes like when two or three are gathered.
When you are making choice you check eternal traits. Traits that helps destiny. Traits that will stand the test of time. If you are not a patient person, you need somebody that is patient. If you are always traveling you need someone who can release you for God, you will need someone who has a mother’s heart.
Character is a deposit. It is an investment. Check character!
Wedding is not marriage. A lot of singles today, what is making them to desire marriage is just the wedding day – just about 2 to 3 hrs. A lot of delay in relationships today occur because couples are planning to save money for unnecessary expenses during the weddings. If you have the money, good! But if not “cut your cloth according to your size”.
Understand the make-up of the opposite sex. If you are a man, understand ladies. If you are a woman, understand men. If you understand the make-up of the opposite sex, you know what to expect.
As a man you need to know that women like to talk, they love attention and they love to be appreciated.
Men love women who are neat. Some sisters are just too dirty. Sisters, the bible says you are a saint not a smell. Take care of your body. Men love neat women.
Men love women who are submissive. Proud women easily have problems because all men are necessarily proud. All men have ego, it’s a masculine nature to be in charge. Every man celebrates a woman who is humble. Every man loves an industrious woman.
Three ways to confirm your marital choice:
- Parents: I grew up to think that if you want to marry anybody, whether your parent like it or not, go ahead. But after some experiences in life I discover that not all parents are wrong. A lot of us have disregarded our parents. I have discovered that seven out of every ten relationships that are broken, the parents always spoke against it. After you have laid down all the attributes that you want, to confirm your choice consider your parent.
- Pastor: There are some brothers and sisters who have Nicodemus kind of anointing, doing everything by night. Your pastor must stand as a witness so that when the young man is trying to mess up in the future, your pastor is there to address it. Don’t always look for prophecies that will please you in relationships. One of the reasons your pastor should know about your relationship is that your pastors have certain experiences so if they see some happenings they can relate it to what has happened in the past.
- Peace: If you do not have peace, back out. Anything that makes you restless God is not involved Heb. 4:9 says God is a God that gives us rest. Any relationship that you are always thinking and losing your weight on, any relationship that is putting you under pressure and you are loosing your peace, Please step out of it! You quarrel today and settle and then you quarrel again, that’s a signal. You fight every two weeks and you are still struggling with that relationship. I say, Stop!
Curled from the sermon ‘before you say I do’ by Apostle Johnson Suleiman
Compiled and edited by FRUITFUL E. JOHN